03 January 2018

Where did the year go!?!?

So I really haven't blogged since the end of 2016. Terrible. I thought I had at least did an entry or two. Ahh well! It's that time again to talk about my year. 2017. This was an interesting year to say the least. It was good for the most part but then it just turned to total CRAP!!! I had many tests. Between life, relationship/friendship, health, work.....it was a whirlwind of both emotion and action. Some relationships got stronger and others took a nose dive. But hey, that's life. I learned alot about myself and others in 2017. I'm wayyyyy more emotional now than I've been in the past. Guess it's time to not be such a hard rock when I'm really a gem right!?!?! LOL So many highs and lows this year. The lows were few but they were SOOOO low they kind of outweigh the good. I felt the worst kind of hurt ever. I felt vulnerable and unsafe. I felt exposed and scared. These aren't things I've used to describe me or my life ever. It's totally unfair to have to deal with any of it due to the unselfish and disloyal actions of another. Someone who is supposed to LOVE you and PROTECT you, yet be the biggest source of putting you in harms way. I never understand how anyone can LOVE someone and then destroy them or hurt them SO deep. How does love allow you to do that??!? I don't claim to have the strongest conscience but if I genuinely love and care for someone, I just CANNOT and WILL NOT do you dirty. Even if it's not intentional ... if there is a chance of hurting them I just will not do whatever it is. Especially not for some selfish, self gratifying temporary reason. That's foolish and CRAZY to say the least. It's cowardly. It's STUPID. It's unfair and it's WRONG! I believe wholeheartedly in KARMA. It always comes back. When you least expect it, it comes back. The karma of screwing over good people is a beast. I'm not perfect by any means but I do know that I am loyal. I'm super honest. Honesty has caused me to lose so called friends etc...but I don't care. I'm still going to keep it 100. You either respect the honesty or hate me for it. That's fine too. But I will never sugarcoat or misinform someone I care about when there is something they NEED to know and be warned about. That's just me. That's exactly what I expect back. This year taught me to only open up to a couple people. It's hard to hold things inside and you have to talk to SOMEBODY but all ears aren't helping ears. Some are just nosey and don't really have your best interest at heart. I pray 2018 is a year of minimal lows. No more hurt, pain, tears, and just plain CRAZY!!! Nothing worse than living what you think is your BEST life. Being "HAPPY" for the first time in a long time and realizing it was all a farce. Your reality wasn't real at all. That the wool had been pulled over your eyes for months. Things were just illusions....but then again...it was great. It was good. You were happy....but that's only because you didn't know everything that was happening around you. The manipulation. The deceipt. Life is so crazy. I try my best to stay positive now after being so pessimistic for YEARS. Every SINGLE time....I'm reminded of why I never just think positive. My smile gets ripped right away. My heart gets ripped in half. My happiness is snatched. The Happy Go Lucky rug is pulled right from underneath my feet. I'm left standing in the cold. Distraught. Hurt. Mad. Confused. Like damn, what kind of life did I lead in my past life?!?! A serial killer child molester dog abuser!?!? Sheesh. All I can do is continue to pray for the best. Not just for me but those in my life. I pray for their healing and brokenness that leads to destructive behavior that not only effects them but those around them and involved with them. I pray for a year of NEWNESS. HAPPINESS. I am so ready to have the life I dreamed of. The life I thought was beginning to surface. A happy life. A close to perfect life. Surrounded by nothing but genuine people. People with my best interest at heart. That I know without a doubt have my back and will have my back. Come on 2018....be GOOD! Be KIND!!! Don't let a sista down. I'm counting on you to erase all of the doubt and pain brought on by the madness in 2017. Although I shall forgive ....I will NEVER, EVER forget.

02 January 2017

Goodbye 2016...it's been real!

Every year this is a blog post that I actually remember to do. The synopsis of the previous year. Well, 2016 was a pretty decent year for the most part. In comparison to the years prior....I gotta say it wasn't that bad on a very personal level. It was a year of loss for a lot of people close to me though so that sucked. I can say that this was a year of growth for me. Not like maturity but just moving on from certain situations and people. I made this post to Facebook on yesterday and this list could've gone on and on but I figured I'd just keep it to the Top 10: 10 Things I learned in 2016....1) I'm getting softer with age (in some aspects) 2) I give way more than I get in return (mostly my TIME), but that's life 3) Misery loves company and clearly I'm a loner because I don't have time 4) You can talk/deal with people EVERY day and still not know them 5) I got some REAL ONES on my team and I know who they are 6) Happiness looks good on me 7) More people say that they want the truth than can actually handle it 8) A private life is INDEED a happIER life 9) My patience (well lack of) is getting WORSE 10) lastly..be true to ME! Those who really care appreciate and love me for being exactly who I am. I had an emotional year. Ups and downs every which way but I learned many valuable lessons. Despite what people THINK about me I'm super giving and supportive of others but I've felt and seen that it's not necessarily reciprocated but yea you don't do things for people FOR the reward...yea yea...yadda yadda. The thing is, it feels good to have someone be there and look out for you and be there for you in the same capacity that you have and/or will for them. I say it all the time...I give what I expect back. Honesty included. I can't and will not sugarcoat so if you don't want the truth then I'm not the friend for you. It's not easy for me to sit back and watch the downfall of somebody when I feel as though I can help because I can SEE it coming. It's a gift. I swear it is to know what people are REALLY about. Some people are so naive and I hate to see naive people getting used and I am aware. I can't sit back...sorry and I wouldn't want any of my FRIENDS to sit back either. TELL ME what's up. I have never really been a real OPEN person to begin with. I keep my thoughts, hurts, situations, problems to myself for the most part. There are a very very limited few that allow to really really know what's good with me. I'm BETTER than probably 5+ years ago when I was borderline depressed and hid it from the world. Trying to stay busy to keep my mind off the troubles and thoughts of disappointment and unhappiness. Now I've opened up more but at the same time by the end of 2016 I started to hold back again. Not problems but just about my moves and life in general. Things just FEEL better! Life isn't perfect, there is always some BS lurking in the shadows but it's amazing what time can reveal and do. I had lots of fun in 2016 and I plan to continue to enjoy life as much as possiby in 2017 and beyond. Tomorrow isn't promised. 2016 showed that! Here today, gone tomorrow! No regrets...living life to the fullest. Cherishing those who are near and dear to my heart and letting those that I do love..KNOW IT and not just by actions but telling them and vice versa. 2017 will be for working on relationships/friendships. Visiting and reconnecting with people who we just keep saying we will link up and it doesn't ever happen. What happens when it's too late??? You can't get back that time you wasted. I just gotta do better. I can't help what others do..I can only control me and my own moves. I have to make adjustments though. Too much efforts to others who don't deserve it. Actually letting people and things bother me that I have to learn to just "not care" about I guess. That's not easy when you always want to LOOK out for everybody, but I gotta use those same thoughts and resources to look out for ME!!!! Not too many others are doing it...so hey...let me look out for me! It's cool...circle got smaller in one aspect but gained new "family" at the same time. I asked for CLARITY from the SOURCE (GOD) over the summer on certain situations and people. I asked that anything not for me be removed and if it's for me reveal it to my heart and mind and my how things changed. I "saw" everything I needed to see. Clearer than ever. 20/20 for the first time and blinders off. Things that I was concerned and unsure about soon changed for the better. Everything is a work in progress....just gotta keep working on it and at it and it turns out exactly how it's meant to. My #1 priority this year is ME and MINE. This is MY year and I'll grab it by the horns even if I have to do it all by myself...but I know I got some riders on my team who will be right by my side.

13 October 2016


So it's no secret that I do a bunch of things to make some extra "change" when I can. I always share the wealth though (not literally) but I do share what I do. Well here are a couple of other things and my old standby to do just that. The holidays are coming and now is a good time to get started putting some cash to the side for those holiday gifts. 1) Win cash! Winners picked EVERY 3 days. 166 winners for each drawing/Every 3 days. Register online or download the app on the App Store or Itunes Store. http://wynzyn.com/ or the app is called WynZyn. Use my referral code for 5 bonus entries: DGX1 2) Get cash back on BEER, WINE, & LIQUOR both in store and at restaurant & bars. (No particular locations necessary). Just submit a picture of your receipt and have money in your PayPal within 48 hrs. Browse ➡ Buy ➡ Snap ➡ Save Download the app (Android or iOS) Use my referral code: IAKLKABO, at Bevrage.com or click the link --> BevRAGE 🍸🍷🍹🍺 = πŸ’΅πŸ’°πŸ’²

I mean, come on..money for alcohol! That is awesome right!?!? 3) And I can't forget good old InstaGC This is my biggest cash cow. Right now they have a holiday bonus going on that allows you to increase the percentage of your bonus up to 10%. So you earn a bonus on top of your normal earnings. It's really easy this year to get that %age up. Good luck winning and Happy Earning! Trust me....I use these myself so they are LEGIT!!!

10 October 2016

2016...New Year. New Lessons. New Life.

I can't believe it's been almost a year since my last entry. Then again...yes I can. LOL Life, love, all that good stuff got in the way but I think it's time I came back. Writing has always been my outlet and it's always been my way to "vent" or get my feelings out as my words and intent seem to always be misunderstood. I've been utilizing the people around me to handle situations and get advice, to talk things out and get perspectives from another side, but lessons have been learned and I guess it's time to change. I guess the things I expect and appreciate from others I feel as though people close to me should also, but I was wrong. Caring too much and going too hard isn't looked upon as helpful anymore I guess. So I'll stay mute and write my thoughts to myself and the random readers of my blog to ingest. More and more I'm learning that nobody goes as hard for me as me. More and more I wish I could just pick up and start fresh elsewhere. Leave nothing but the memories here. My thoughts at times are all over the places, both good and bad. As I fight hard to keep back the bad thoughts, I realize what I do have and I'm grateful and thankful. I'm blessed. Regardless of the bad things that I endure pretty much daily. The hurt I encounter for just trying to do RIGHT. The "work" I put in that goes unappreciated. Nobody truly knows but me. Holding shit in isn't healthy but I guess it's time I go back to guarded, closed off Toya. In the end, it works out better for me! Me, myself, and & I.....100% loyal. Can't go wrong with these 3. The year wrap up post is coming soon. It's been a pretty positive year honestly but it's ending with the bullshit. I think the winter will be hell (not looking forward to it). Work is crazy, life is crazy, my relationships with certain people are now crazy,.....oh life. You throw hurdles at me all the time, but just know that I'm a professional jumper. What you will not do is STOP me. I'm in the race for the long haul....I'm still running...just waiting the be passed the baton. I will not LOSE! Whatever is meant to be for me, will be. Love, friends, career, goals, life...taking a step back and letting God be the driver. He's always had the keys, I've just been using the spares.

04 November 2015

A Product Review --- An Honest One

So everyone knows that I love to try new things. I am a FREEBIE junkie and my mailman hates me...lol But I like to be the first to try out new things and share my honest opinion from on what I think of said products. So today will be one of those days. Let me begin with saying that I received this product for FREE for my honest and unbiased review. Today's products come from Curel and it was from my Curel Influenster Voxbox. I received a 1 oz sample of their Itch Defense Body Wash. I am a fan of wonderful scents so in that area..there really is nothing to report. There really isn't a scent to the body wash. I have sensitive skin so soaps and body wash I have to be very careful what I use. This gentle cleanser was not an issue for me and my skin. It is starting to get cold outside so itchy, dry skin can be an issue. I used to body wash and everything was fine. No itching. My skin wasn't particularly dry after or anything so this is a plus. Now the other product I received was a full sized bottle of Curel Itch Defense Instant Soothing Moisuturing Spray. Now I don't know if I was just half asleep or what but at first I was confused at how to use it. The top has a "lock" and I was trying to unscrew the top and all kinds of extraness. LOL After I figured it out *slaps forehead*, I sprayed some on my leg. I am not very fond of the smell of the spray and it also comes out with way more than I think it should. It looked like a foam on my leg and required me to rub it in. If I wanted to have to rub it in, I'd just get regular lotion so to be a SPRAY it was an EPIC FAIL to me in that sense. I think of buying a spray and just spraying and go. Not the case with this. It's been about 10 minutes and my leg is still very wet in the area I sprayed and NO I didn't just spray heavy. I did a quick burst and kept the bottle moving not just a straight stream in one spot. It's not bad but I personally don't think I'd buy this spray. The body wash I may purchase if I feel I'm having very dry skin issues but the spray I don't feel it's worth the efforts I have to put in to use it.

07 September 2015

My how time flies. I haven't blogged since February! Sheesh. I know, I know...I have to do better. LOL What can I say, life gets in the way and even though writing is an outlet sometimes I just don't even feel like doing that. In a nutshell, life has been good for the most part. Of course there will always be some downs to go along with the ups. For a minute there, my mentals were full of DOWNS. I faked it like I do so well (or so I think). Nothing worse than feeling low and down and really not knowing the root of the problem. Being a funk is not healthy and it outright sucks. It's the product of holding your thoughts and feelings in for far too long and then just being on overload. I'm still a work in progress. I should take my own advice but let's face it...most of us don't do that. *sigh*

Since I last wrote, I finally took a REAL vacation for the first time since 1997. Sad right!?!? By real vacation I mean leaving the city/state for a WEEK. Not a weekend trip...not a visit to family...a REAL VACATION to escape it all and I must say it was much needed and totally helped. Now I have travel fever. I still haven't been anywhere else since but plans are definitely being made. All of that will come to a halt in a couple of weeks since I WON A TRIP TO VEGAS!!! Woot Woot!!! And the sad part is I almost deleted the winning email because I thought that it was spam. I mean, we know how spam is. SMH The internet is insane with SPAM!

I'm still making this "side cash" (see list in previous entry). InstaGC is still my #1 but I think since I created that list below I have added a few more cash cows and I will share the links in a follow up blog entry. I'm still getting freebies galore and pissing off my mailman and still entering contests. I won another fair and square for a hoverboard and apparently the guys running it just wanted to drive traffic to their You Tube video because I have heard nothing and the live leaderboard is still accessible and yea...umm your girl had a score 8x higher than the person who came in 2nd. I won honestly. No cheating. I shared my link like a rapper handed out his mixtape...and nothing. I'm not happy and am trying to best to FIND these individuals.

Anyway.....just a quick check in blog post. I'll be back with those links and more random babbles. For now....I'll just post my newest venture. Selling Spirit Lockets. What are Spirit Lockets...they are cute and wonderful ways to show your spirit and pride and love. You can get a necklace, a bracelet, a chain, and even a work lanyard. They make awesome gifts!!! Check out my site and get your very own Spirit Locket.

Uniique Designz Spirit Lockets

Until next time......

28 December 2014

Things to do to earn cash, gift cards, etc

So this post will be a bit different.  Here I will let everyone in on things I do when I have downtime or I'm bored that help me earn money, gift cards, and savings etc.  When I'm not working like crazy and I'm just online or on my phone dibbling and dabbling, then I'm usually entering sweepstakes (yep, you can't and won't win if you do not enter).   That is almost like a part time though.  It pays off. I've had quite a few small and big wins as of late.   :-)    Anyways, here are the other things you can do (with explanation of what they are and what I typically do, as well as, my honest opinion on how they work.

1) INFLUENSTER - A community where there are various campaigns annually, in which you can earn "VoxBoxes" which contain complimentary full-size products to test and review.   This community also is a place to ask questions and provide answers to others pertaining to products, services, apps, etc.    I can say that I have received about 4 or 5 boxes since I joined, not so many as of late since the community has grown so big.   It's worth it though. Can't really complain about not receiving anything FREE.   Just make sure you actually complete the questionnaires and such and participate as much as possible to build up your "score" so that you can be eligible for boxes more often.

2) INSTAGC -  Complete offers, watch videos, play games, download apps, etc to earn points that can in turn be traded in for INSTANT giftcards such as Amazon.  They have a helpful chat and plenty of information.  You can find groups and such on Facebook that help you find big payout tasks  and those that credit quickly.   I personally really like InstaGC.  If I really buckled down and did more things, I'm sure I'd earn lots of points super fast.   The giftcards are in fact issues instantly.   Definitely a MUST that you join. Gift cards can be issued for  as low as $1.

3) VINDALE RESEARCH - Complete surveys to earn cash.   I can personally vouch that this is a legit company. I did one cash out already for $50 that I had deposited into my PayPay and I am well on my way to my next $50.   $50 is the minimum you can cash out for.  Now to keep it real, I rarely do the actual surveys unless they are for things I'm almost sure I'll qualify for like pets or entertainment.   The cool thing is they do contests ALL the time on their blog and Facebook for various amounts of money. They do a 50 cent contest daily (weekdays) and just ask a question and 20 people are selected and win 50 cents.  Sometimes this increases to $1.00.  That's how I basically rack up my cash from the daily contests or photo caption contests that they have.   It's not a QUICK money maker but it is truly legit.  If you like doing surveys then you'll definitely earn much faster.

4) SPRINGBOARD AMERICA - Another survey site to earn straight cash.   Payouts for me have averaged $1.75 for each that I qualify for and complete.  I can say that of all the survey based sites, I qualify for these pretty much moreso than not.   Depending on your personal lifestyle, livelihood, likes, and dislikes you may qualify for some pretty nice paid surveys.  Some worth up to $200 if completed. I have a few dollars in my account, but with so many others that I am working with and on, I don't get to spend but so much time at each individual site. I do like Springboard though.

5) RECEIPT HOG - Simply earn prizes by taking pictures of your receipts.  Walmart, Dollar Tree, Dollar General, etc.   Pretty easy.  I am pretty new to this, but my points are racking up quickly.  They also have daily spins and extra bonus spins you can earn.   I'll need more time to truly say yay or nay on this one.

6) FREE EATS -  Get paid to receive texts! Join now and get $1.25 in your PayPal account today.  I just joined and did in fact get two PayPal payments within the first 30 minutes of joining.  The first .25 basically verifies your account and then you get $1.00 a small time after.   A new campaign is starting soon so I'll see what this is really worth.   

HAPPY MONEY AND GIFT CARD earning! As I find other creative, fun and easy ways to earn a little extra change and prizes, I'll add on.   There are others that I am signed up for but haven't really done anything with them enough to RECOMMEND.  If anybody knows of others I should check out, be sure to comment and let me know.  :-) 

21 December 2014

2014 - A Look Back

First of all, I can't believe that it's already the end of December. It feels like I was celebrating my birthday for 2014 and here it is less than a month away.   This year has been a pretty positive one for me.   In comparison to recent years, hell it's been GREAT.    Many things have changed, some stayed the same, and of course there are things that got worse.   I've moved (that's nothing new, hell I'm always moving lol).  Work has been the same but I feel a change coming in that area possibly in 2015, God willing.   In the search for my life's dream, a career more suited for what I LIKE to do has to be entered into the picture.  Love found ME in 2014.  Unexpected and almost story book.  Funny how stuff like that works.   Never would I have imagined that what I was looking for would come out of a dark place.   Our story is one nobody really knows but us and that's the beautiful thing about it.  Something so major yet so private.....lol  the mystery shall live on forever.  ;-)   Inquiring minds will always want to know THE STORY...and they'll always get the same generic answer.  Oh well.....lol

I've met many new people and established new relationships with people.  New connections and new "business" ideas have blossomed. So ready to get my creative juices back flowing.   It's been far too long and putting things I love to do on the back burner can no longer continue.  Some connections seemed to have been lost this year.  Not sure why but I guess that's life.  You win some..you lose some.   People need time and space, so hey you give it to them.   It is what it is.   If it's just that..then it's fine.  Usually, however, it's more to it than just that.   Assumptions get made, he said/she said, feelings usually aren't expressed which lead to misconceptions.....and in the end....relationships are scarred when in fact it's all total BS and no reason anything should've changed at all.   *shrugs* Again, this is life.  What can you do?    People will do what they will do and think what they will think, all you can do is continue to live.  

A lot of the lives around me changed this year too.  I've seen close friends celebrate some really BIG things (new careers, new loves, new FOREVERS, new babies) and I've seen plenty of losses (family members, jobs, marriages,...).   Lots of emotion....celebrating in one moment and being a shoulder to lean on the next.  Figuring out exactly what different individuals need at that moment....some need to be alone, some NEED you there, some want to talk, some just want you to listen.....it's not easy. All you can do is BE THERE and hope you get it right and if not, hope they understand that you did what you thought they needed in THAT moment. True friends understand that.....others...not so much.   You won't always get it right and well, that's alright.  

So what's next?   I had plenty of fun in 2014 but I didn't travel like I would like.  A vacation or two are on the agenda and planning has begun. Ideas are being thrown around and research has started.   More FAMILY time, more FRIEND time, and more ME time is a must in 2015.   I think I did pretty good with treating myself to things here and there but I still deserve to do ME more often.  I work hard and hey..playtime is also needed to keep life well balanced.    There are goals I have set for 2015.   Things I would like to see happen and changes I want to make.   My eye is on the prize..NOW to just put in the work required to achieve these things.    The PRESSURE is on........  if it's in God's plan....these things will be brought into existence.  

27 November 2014

Oh, Influenster

Sooo...it's been awhile since I blogged.   What, you may ask, have I been up to?  Ohhhh just getting and reviewing wonderful products and samples.   How, you may ask!??!  Well I joined the lovely site Influenster (www.influenster.com)  in Dec 2011.   It's been cool so far.  Earning badges by answering questions, doing small surveys, and providing feedback from the VoxBoxes (product boxes) that I receive.  Now they even have a mobile app available for both iOS and Android.  Making activities so much more convenient.  I just downloaded my Android InfluensterApp on yesterday and jumped right into getting my badge for it.

I've received quite a few VoxBoxes. I've discovered many great products through these boxes.  I fell in love with the Luxor chocolates I received and went out and bought my own.  I've stepped outside of the box and tried various colors of nail polish that I wouldn't normally venture into because I have received them in a box or 2.  

Influenster has definitely opened my eyes to new and exciting foods, drinks, health and beauty products, and a list of other things.   I am glad that I signed up and joined the team.   If you'd like to venture into doing the same, I urge you to sign up for yourself.  You can go here to sign up!