So it's already November, and I'm looking back at 2007 and I'm really not liking it. Things in my life were starting to really come together and look up in 2006. That was one of the best years I've had...prior to 1997 when my life was turned upside down...over and over and over again. Those very close to me know what started the drama in that year...now 10 years later....it's almost as bad. Not quite as bad, but very close to it. I did have a couple of good months then...but oh no..this year....my year started out terrible. Once again, life altering news/events took place. I had to be reminded and remind myself that God only gives you as much as you can handle and I know everything happens for a reason. I've truly learned alot about myself this year and alot of other people close to me. I learned that certain individuals that I didn't think cared, really and truly do. I learned that I have some really greats friends. I also learned that a few people that I considered my friends....yall ain't shit. You know who you are!!! You sit here saying how things will be the same or won't change or you will be there for someone...and the next minute you are all of a sudden missing in action, unavailable, and can not be contacted. It's all good though. Believe me, it's people like YOU that I do NOT need in my life.
LOCATION....I'm moving...again..it's been almost 2 years..that I've sat still. SHOCKING!!!! I'm glad to be moving though...for SOOOO many reasons. For one, certain people can't find me unless I want to be found. Sick of apartment living....I'm about ready to bust up a few neighbors. And of course, Jigga needs a yard.
THOUGHTS...So as 2008 approaches, I'm gonna change my mindset a little. I'ma start looking out for me. Stop putting myself out there for the benefit of others. Apparently I value them more than they value me. If you not fam or those FEW close friends, that know I have their back, then for real, for real....don't EXPECT alot out of me next year. I can't depend on you...then don't TRY to depend on me. I know I'm a good person, and in the end, I will be rewarded for that. I don't want anything from anybody. It's not the common person that I have to answer to.
WORK....works been good in 07...that I can say. Alot of drama went down at the job place, but that happens. I did get a promotion and some more paper. Thank god for that. I also got a new part time and will probably get another one. What can I say!?!? I'ma workaholic and I love money....and im super independent. So I do what I have to do to get MYSELF what I want. I don't want to ask or need to ask anyone for ANYTHING. I want to do things for myself.
RELATIONSHIPS....there were a few guys that had potential in `07. I never expressed it really, but it was there. As the year draws to a close and I've kinda dealt with them a bit....I dunno. I don't think I'm on the same level with any of them right now. I like to say I'm 'not looking'...because I hate that term 'looking'...like you are just son the hunt and seeking out something. I'ma 'whatever happens happens' kinda person. But nothings gonna happen when everybody on some "I'm not trying to get in a relationship right now" kinda mode. I was there most of the year myself....but I'm knocking on 29's door...and it reallllyyy doesn't look like a child before 30 is truly in my future.
HIM......same ol bullshit. Still taking it day by day. It definitely is what it is. Not really sure what's really going on right now as it's been a minute. I hope everything is okay, but I've pretty much realized.....it's never gonna be that fate/fairy tale that we always said it was.
LIFE....I did slow up on the going out toward the middle of `07. I had the best birthday EVER this year. THANKS TO MY GIRLZ!!!! It's gonna be hard to top it, but I'ma damn sure try. I'm trying to stay busy and that is something that will definitely carry on to `08.
So as the end of 07 draws closer, I realize that it's been a trying and learning year. I've lost a few SO-CALLED friends along the way, but better sooner than later. I'ma still be me. I'ma be even MORE honest next year, so I'll probably lose a few more along the way, but it's all good. I don't need them in my corner anywayz. DEAD WEIGHT!!! 2007 has educated me ALOT on ALOT of things. I just hope 2008 is better.