2014 - A Look Back

First of all, I can't believe that it's already the end of December. It feels like I was celebrating my birthday for 2014 and here it is less than a month away.   This year has been a pretty positive one for me.   In comparison to recent years, hell it's been GREAT.    Many things have changed, some stayed the same, and of course there are things that got worse.   I've moved (that's nothing new, hell I'm always moving lol).  Work has been the same but I feel a change coming in that area possibly in 2015, God willing.   In the search for my life's dream, a career more suited for what I LIKE to do has to be entered into the picture.  Love found ME in 2014.  Unexpected and almost story book.  Funny how stuff like that works.   Never would I have imagined that what I was looking for would come out of a dark place.   Our story is one nobody really knows but us and that's the beautiful thing about it.  Something so major yet so private.....lol  the mystery shall live on forever.  ;-)   Inquiring minds will always want to know THE STORY...and they'll always get the same generic answer.  Oh well.....lol

I've met many new people and established new relationships with people.  New connections and new "business" ideas have blossomed. So ready to get my creative juices back flowing.   It's been far too long and putting things I love to do on the back burner can no longer continue.  Some connections seemed to have been lost this year.  Not sure why but I guess that's life.  You win some..you lose some.   People need time and space, so hey you give it to them.   It is what it is.   If it's just that..then it's fine.  Usually, however, it's more to it than just that.   Assumptions get made, he said/she said, feelings usually aren't expressed which lead to misconceptions.....and in the end....relationships are scarred when in fact it's all total BS and no reason anything should've changed at all.   *shrugs* Again, this is life.  What can you do?    People will do what they will do and think what they will think, all you can do is continue to live.  

A lot of the lives around me changed this year too.  I've seen close friends celebrate some really BIG things (new careers, new loves, new FOREVERS, new babies) and I've seen plenty of losses (family members, jobs, marriages,...).   Lots of emotion....celebrating in one moment and being a shoulder to lean on the next.  Figuring out exactly what different individuals need at that moment....some need to be alone, some NEED you there, some want to talk, some just want you to listen.....it's not easy. All you can do is BE THERE and hope you get it right and if not, hope they understand that you did what you thought they needed in THAT moment. True friends understand that.....others...not so much.   You won't always get it right and well, that's alright.  

So what's next?   I had plenty of fun in 2014 but I didn't travel like I would like.  A vacation or two are on the agenda and planning has begun. Ideas are being thrown around and research has started.   More FAMILY time, more FRIEND time, and more ME time is a must in 2015.   I think I did pretty good with treating myself to things here and there but I still deserve to do ME more often.  I work hard and hey..playtime is also needed to keep life well balanced.    There are goals I have set for 2015.   Things I would like to see happen and changes I want to make.   My eye is on the prize..NOW to just put in the work required to achieve these things.    The PRESSURE is on........  if it's in God's plan....these things will be brought into existence.