You Must Not Know Bout Me

It's funny how people who KNOW you act like they don't know you. What I mean is, they act like they don't know how you get down. What pisses you off? What you will and won't do? What your reactions to certain things are? Those kind of things. For instance, those who really know me know I ride HARD for my FRIENDS and FAM. I also do not use the word FRIEND loosely. If you are part time, off and on, and on that bullsh*t ... you are NOT on my list of friends. You are an associate (if I give you that much credit). So why anyone who KNOWS me thinks it's okay to text, KIK, inbox, email, call and INQUIRE on some nosey/gossip sh*t about a FRIEND of mine is beyond me. First and foremost, anything you want to know about them, you need to ask THEM. You not getting that from me. If you have issue with them and ESPECIALLY if they have issue with you, more than likely so does Toya. Wronging a FRIEND is like WRONGING me. Sometimes I question if people are as loyal to ME as I am to them. I'm sure some aren't but as long as I don't hear or see the shade then what I don't know doesn't hurt me. Another thing I can't stand, when an individual just blatantly wants to be nosey about stuff. I don't hear from you for anything besides trying to get some scoop. Please dismiss yourself. Where were you 2 weeks ago when I was sick!?!? Not in my inbox checking to see if I was okay. Where were you when I had a reason to be extremely happy!?!? Not texting me to say congrats and offer your well wishes on it. But LET something pop off and clearly I know something about it...here YOU go. SMH..just outright rude and annoying. I remember a time when I would deal with people on a "just because" basis. Like, I would deal just because I hated being bored and this person likes to hang out. Well as of 2013, I ended that routine. I don't have time for just because or Part Time Pals. I keep it 100. If I can't confide in you or depend on you, then I have no use for you. I make myself available 24/7 for those I care about. I work alot and I try to play alot too. But in between it all, I have TIME for who and what I want to have time for. Yes, life can get in the way of some things, but that's when you are considerate enough to let people know that you can't do this or that. A little consideration of other people's time goes a long way. I hate nothing more than to have my time wasted. I could be doing something else, waiting on you. Oh the drama and anger that could be reduced with a simple TEXT to say "I'm late", "I can't make it" , "something came up". And spare the lies...if you don't WANT to do something then don't say that you do. If you did at first and then your mind changed, SAY SO. I have so much respect for the truth but I have absolutely none for lies and decept. And the end of the day, it's your time and your decisions to make but at the same time, don't waste mine with the bullsh*t. I can't get that time back but what I can do is no longer set aside any for the habitual offender. My life and time is just as precious as the next, we aren't promised the next second, minute, or hour. People make alot of excuses about why they can't do this or that, and I still feel that you make time for who and what you want. For some it's easier than others, but again you can still make time. A visit, a call, a text...they are all quick and easy ways to give time to someone. Social media has definitely shown and opened my eyes to people's time usage. It's rather amusing actually. I'm very observant so I peep things the average person doesn't....while others are putting 2 and 2 together, I'm seeing 3 and 1. It is what it is though. People are going to do what they do....but what can you do!?!? I know what I can do...not deal with it! *chucks the deuces* I'm at a happy point in my life. I'm pretty private (even seen through this blog since I never mention names or point out specifics), I've kept alot of lows in the last few years hidden and not too many people even know. Last year this time, I was pretty depressed I'd say. I had alot on my mind and that I was dealing with that I couldn't even really talk about because it would just open up older wounds that nobody really knows/knew about so instead I kept it all in and dealt with is as best I knew how. I had a few people who genuinely were concerned an encouraged me to keep my head up and I appreciated it. What a difference a day makes!!!! I'm private for one, it decreases the chance for drama and two...when I share things it seems like things fall apart so I've learned to stay hush at least for awhile. I claimed a year better than the last and I must say in most aspects 2014 has been just that. We're halfway in and I can't wait to see what else is store. I'm sure more huge surprises for me and involving me. ;-) I feel like I'm tuned into my OWN show. Looking from the outside in, it's kinda unreal but I love it! I'm going to try to blog more. It's like FREE therapy. Since people have asked and I've been slacking, I'll do my best to write SOMETHING if not several times a week, then maybe at least once a week (I'm sure that won't happen, but I'll try). Until next time......

Oh wow..

Damn, I haven't been around here in a hot minute. I'll be back though. A lot has happened since my last post. Plenty of things to speak on. Changes, good things, bad things, outlooks, plans......so many things. I'll definitely be back. I've been hit up by quite a few "followers" who noticed my blogging absence and I've been encouraged to step my game up. I'm listening and I'll be back to my "blog therapy" in the next week or 2. :-)